Don't freeze Mighty Thor's doors shut!

Apparently I'm Mighty Thor.

I learned this because I broke a house today. And I figure the only character that can do that without being super ugly is Thor. I mean have you seen the man? Long luxurious locks of flowing blond hair and huge muscles. I'll take that over the Hulk (green), The Thing (bumpy due to rock formation), or Superman (asshole) any day.

Yes, yes. I smashed a bit of a house today. Only a bit, but none the less. And to top off the awesomeness, it was my boss' house.

Freaking winner. That's what I am.

You see, I've been dog/house sitting for my boss while she's been out of town for the past three days. Up until this morning everything was great. But last night the already bad weather turned south and there was freezing rain. Naturally, this would be one of only four or five days this past year that my car has been outside for bad winter weather. So of course my car doors froze shut. All four of them. Which I discovered this morning on my way out the door.

After four buckets of hot water my one door popped open. But by then I was already late for work. I kind of wasn't paying the best attention as I backed up and wound up hitting the corner of her house with my mirror. I cracked a piece of her siding about a foot and broke the bottom half of her gutter.

Yea. I'm big. I'm bad. I'm destructive. Get me mad (i.e. freezing my car doors shut), and I get even! For I am ... MIGHTY THOR!!!!!!

Or rather I feel like a jack ass and am not looking forward to telling her about it later. Of course I'm going to offer to pay for the damages which sucks in and of itself, but I'm also not looking forward to disappointing her.

Which to me says something. If I didn't like/respect her, I'd be upset but only about the money, more or less. But since I think she's a pretty chill lady, I'm freaking kicking myself. I just hope this doesn't make her think differently of me. That would...well suck. Hardcore.

So here's a lesson for you Lucky Readers:

When backing out of driveways, make sure you watch the most expensive thing around. Cause the minute you take your eyes off it, that's when you'll hit it. And although that will make you into a gorgeous superhero based off of mythology, it's not nearly as fun a manifestation to exist in as it sounds.

After all, superheros are tortured souls. As a rule.

This is why.